Central African Nation Erupts in Violence

[RockinRightSide News Service – 3/20/23] Civil war has broken out in the once-prosperous central African nation of the Ugandi States. Brutal violence in the streets has replaced the domestic tranquility and personal freedoms that made the nation a “shining beacon on a hill,” admired by all the world and a prized destination for immigrants fleeing oppression and poverty in their home countries.

The conflict started three years ago when the sitting president of the Ugandi States, Donno Trompo, was re-elected by a large majority of the populace, but the entrenched opposition party, who had maintained de facto control of the government throughout Trompo’s term, used a variety of dishonest and illegal tactics to steal the election. State media suppressed news of the election anomalies and proclaimed challenger JoJo Bidenu as the legitimate president of the Ugandi States.

As the Bidenu administration met to certify the illicit election, Trompo supporters who had gathered at the nation’s capital to protest, were beaten and sprayed with chemicals by state police on the steps of the Ugandi States capitol building. When police ratcheted up the violence, what had been a peaceful protest got out of hand. It was later learned that Bidenu government infiltrators aggressively attempted to instigate a riot and breach of the capitol building to justify their election theft. Despite allegations of protester violence by the Bidenu regime, no state officials were seriously harmed.

Four of the protesters were murdered by the authorities; one was shot in the face, one was bludgeoned to death, and two died after being struck with flash bang grenades. The Bidenu regime denied these atrocities, but the events were recorded on incriminating video. Hundreds more protesters were arrested and imprisoned on unfounded and unproven charges. Many of these prisoners were kept in inhumane, filthy jail cells for months and years without access to health care, families, attorneys, or court dates. Most Ugandi States citizens were unaware of the plight of these political prisoners as the Bidenu administration and state media hid their existence from public view.

All pretense of fairness and justice was abandoned in the Ugandi States court system as judges installed by the Bidenu regime refused to hear evidence or provide any form of due process. All of those charged with crimes were presumed guilty. The Ugandi States once-revered constitution was nullified, replaced by a spoils system that rewarded supporters of the Bidenu regime and punished Trompo loyalists.

Civil unrest grew as financial conditions in the Ugandi States deteriorated under the Bidenu regime. Citizens bristled at the government’s corrupt confiscation of wealth and distribution to connected cronies. Government overspending and manipulation of currency, interest rates and financial markets led to rampant inflation which fueled poverty and homelessness. Most banks were forced out of business leaving desperate depositors pondering how to recover their life savings.

Thousands of Ugandi States citizens died after a man-made weaponized virus escaped from a Bidenu-funded laboratory. Using the ensuing pandemic as cover, the regime imposed lockdowns which destroyed businesses and schools, and caused chronic depression. Then the government mandated forced vaccinations that turned out to be deadly rather than therapeutic.

Reports surfaced of Bidenu and his family members taking bribes from foreign governments and companies in exchange for favorable treatment and payments from the national treasury. Ugandi States taxpayers were enraged.

The tinderbox of public sentiment in the Ugandi States was already volatile when the corrupt courts of the Bidenu regime arrested former president Trompo on specious charges. It was the final straw in a long series of provocations that citizens could no longer tolerate.

The capital city of the Ugandi States is now under siege as military and other security officials contemplate which side of the conflict to join. Police departments that were defunded and abandoned by the Bidenu regime are unable to restore order as government loyalists loot and burn cities.

Meanwhile, adversary nations are weighing their military options with the resource-rich Ugandi States government in utter disarray.

Prayers are in order for this nation teetering on destruction. More news will be forthcoming as events develop.

** This article is a parody

Tom Balek – Rockin’ On the Right Side

Trump won, and you know it
Trump won, and you know it
Fox News won’t even show it
Trump won, and you know it

Trump Won and You Know It – Natasha Owens



The USA: Back in the USSR!

We used to laugh at Boris and Natasha, never dreaming that the USA would someday replace the former USSR as the world’s most stupid, backwards, nonsensible socialist nation.

Did you feel sorry for Soviet moms waiting in line at the grocery store only to find empty shelves? That could never happen in the mighty USA, the world’s economic dynamo and home of free markets, right? Lately American shoppers are finding not only empty shelves and six-month lead times for ordinary products, but also Argentina-style price inflation.

The United States once had a vibrant free press that would investigate government corruption in a New York minute, while in the USSR, Pravda was the only news available to Russian citizens, and it was nothing more than propaganda straight from the totalitarian Soviet government. Hmmm, kind of sounds like CNN, MSNBC, and Facebook, right? Hunter who?

The USA, through applied technology and free enterprise, became energy independent and enjoyed the economic boost that abundant and affordable energy (oil and natural gas) can provide. But wait, our new administration is pushing alternative energy without considering the scientific realities: solar and wind can’t come close to the reliability, sustainability and low cost of petroleum energy.

See the source image

Cars from the USSR back in the day were almost useless. Check out our new $50,000 high-tech electric cars that require a 75 amp service for recharging when most homes only are wired for 100 amps, and our electric grid limits us to only three Teslas per block in most cities. Plus the puny 274 mile range of our best hybrids and 10-hour recharge cycle makes long distance travel impossible even if you can afford the cost of the electricity that is ten times the cost per mile of gasoline.

But we still have our freedom, right? At least we don’t have a KGB watching our every move and abusing our rights. No, we have the FBI tapping our phones and emails and instigating “insurgencies” to harass and arrest anyone who opposes our oppressive federal government.

Soviet elections were known world-wide to be manipulated. Now the USA sets the world standard in election fraud, making Vladimir Putin look like a piker.

But boy, the Soviets sure screwed up in Afghanistan, didn’t they?

What a bunch of losers! So glad that couldn’t happen to our vaunted American military – our foreign policy is so superior that we now have a transgendered four-star admiral in leadership. Thanks, Mr. President, for striking fear into the hearts of our adversaries.

Yeah, haha. The old Soviet Union sure was a joke.

Tom Balek – Rockin’ On the Right Side

I’m back in the U.S.S.R.
You don’t know how lucky you are, boy
Back in the U.S.S.R.

Back in the USSR – the Beatles